Happy birthday to my dearest short cousin, Yeeru! :) Happy 13th, enjoy!

School was okay, was trying to take a chance but tak-layan face was shown, fed-up.
Mdm Fat is absent from school, spent 2 hours on my art, couldn't concentrate, fuck.
Played with Velvet paper with Fana. Fun, yes.
Ate rice during recess.

Social studies was ok, a fight broke out at opp class, bro's. Between Jesse and CP.
Lame shit, damn lame.
Chinese had spelling, then did social studies worksheet.
After school went to canteen then to class 4E.

Met Mr Raj, passed him the worksheets.
Yes, attitude attitude, haiz.

Went for star, english. did work, slept.
Woke up, changed seat, songs plugged in, thinking of alot of stuffs.
Tolerating, very hard.

Went to canteen, with Fadhila and Fana. Recieved a text from someone.
Bitching around, cb around, teary eyes.
Field, talked to Akif.

Then left for canteen.
Farris talked to me while we exchange our shoes back.
God, im so fucking cb stupid.

Left school around 6.30, was stoning all the while. sorry guys, i cried again. :'(
Walked home with alson and fadluddin. didn't talk much, they rushed the traffic while i waited.

Reached home, bath, stone, online.
Found out somethang, god, what did i do to deserve all these man?

you know what, i meant what i said, but not every words, not words of fustrations.
and you got me so jumbled up.

everything's not going right, someone kill me puh-lease. -_-

Water mix detergent, should i drink you up and end everything?

I can't take it already, haiz. :'(

should i cry or angry?

weak or strong?

continue or break?

Ah, fuck, whatever shit. holy cb mama, stop crying bitch!! -_-

Edited at 9.42pm.

Thanks for all the concerns, i seriously got no idea whether am i alright. what can i say other than I'm Fine. All The Best. Don't Cry. I'm Okay ? Please, i really don't know what to do. What can i do but to cry? You know, i really felt like crying since i saw your pm on the 21st. But i told myself, i'm thinking too much. Soccer match, soccer match..

Never thought that i'm lying to myself.
Never ever thought that i'm such a liar, even to myself.
Never thought that i'm that naive, super-naive.
Never thought that i'm that weak, such a weakling.
I feel like hiding, i don't want to go out.

I should have went to Indonesia and absent myself from school.
I should have stop myself.
I should have just continue to lie to myself.
I should have did my should haves.

Now, stand up from the place where i fell down, move on with my life, concentrate on my studies. But i know, it will be effing freaking fucking cb hard to just forget! I need to control my emotions, i hope, i can get over it soon, strongly without tears.

But, who's gonna help me up? :'(